Default Purchase Consideration: We are split here with a recommendation to start with the AirPods 4 or with the AirPods Pro 3.
MOST IMPORTANT CONSIDERATION: how do they fit you? The 4 series and the Pro's all fit differently. If you can test them in your ears, you should. If not, purchase the ones that are your first choice from somewhere with a great return policy (like Apple). Use them extensively. Don't just pop them in your ears for 5 minutes and think you are set.
When to Buy the 4 (no ANC): this is the budget option and if they are comfortable, are a great choice. These are good for those that don't use ANC or those that ANC causes discomfort.
When to Buy the 4 with ANC: if the Pro's don't fit well or budget is the driver.
When to Buy the Pros: if budget is not a consideration, these are the ones we would both recommend you test first. The features and performance are unrivaled.
When to Buy the Max: if you know you want or need them, go for it.
Other Considerations
How Long Will you Keep the AirPods: after comfort and fit, consider how long you will keep and use these. If you don't plan to buy new ones until they die, go for the Pros.
Buy AppleCare +. This is an easy recommendation, especially if you are buying these for a teen.